One of the most helpful things you can do for your friends — for anyone, really, is to spot their joy. There have been times when friends have said to me, “You totally light up when you talk about that!” And I’m like, “I DO, don’t I?! Ya, maybe I should pursue that more, or make more time for that, or put that at the top of the list.” To have my joy reflected back to me, to be seen in that way — it’s a powerful affirmation of being on track.

The most powerful form of observation is spotting someone in their joy.

Most of us don’t need more advice or constructive criticism. We need to be witnessed in what’s working, in what we’re doing “right” to create our ideal life.

It’s someone saying:

You light up when you talk about that…
You seem so happy when…
You looked like you were having the time of your life…
You glow when you describe that…
Your whole body language shifts when you talk about…
It’s always the first thing you want to talk about…
You get so excited when…
You’re on fire when…
You’re so sexy when…
You’re unstoppable when…